I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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