stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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