You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
