I think I am morally bankrupt
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
