Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
