Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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