friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
