butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
