margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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