her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
and you fell through a lawn chair
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize