OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Randomize
