Define "chronic" masturbator.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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