All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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