The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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