so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
