At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
