I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
They are going to name an STD after you.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
