ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
