Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
