I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
