That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You made out with two different species that night
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
