that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
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