Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
