i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
ttyl tear gas
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
