hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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