so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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