Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
