brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
