Already got asked if we're dating
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
