Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
