i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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