What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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