You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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