After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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