Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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