I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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