i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Randomize
