pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
