I want to make a zoo with you.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
