smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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