i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
