you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
