drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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