Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize
