today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize