So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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