Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize