problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
