not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
