So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
