I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
